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Frequently Asked Questions (Continued)
Response:
Check out
http://www.dtic.dla.mil/adm/direct_instruct.html
I found some additional information you might want to pass on to any and all military personnel interested in adoption. There is a DoD directive which will reimburse military personnel up to $2,000 in adoption related expenses. The web site referenced above will take you to a DoD directive locator. Type in "Adoption" and submit the query. It will come up with the appropriate DoD Instruction. The DoD Instruction reference number is DODI-1341.9, dated 29 July 93.
Check out the following military information.You can go to your base personnel to find out about it. Also, there is help through the county fost-adopt programs.
Excellent and easy to read and understand article on attachment disorder.
Resource Person for Attachment Disorder, Disruption, Sensory Integration, Eastern Europe Adoptions
Pat Donahue 908-549-8717
Email: p.k.donahue@worldnet.net
Response from TURNING POINT
Thank you for your interest in ABC News Turning PointIs "Romania: What Happened to the Children?"
To order a transcript
please call 1-800-ALL-NEWS.
To order a videotape
please call 1-800-913-3434.
Listed below are possible contacts for more information:
PARENT NETWORK FOR THE POST INSTITUTIONALIZED CHILD
P.O. Box 613
Meadow Lands PA 15347
Tel. (412) 222-1766
Fax. (770) 979-3140
e-mail address: PNPIC@AOL.com
Suggestions of other researchers professionals to contact:
Dr. Harry Chugani
Pediatric Neurologist
Positron Emission Tomography Center
ChildrenIs Hospital of Michigan
PET Center
3901 Beaubien Blvd.
Detroit MI 48201-2196
Tel. 313-745-5431
Dr. Dana Johnson
Has done extensive research on international adoptees
University of Minnesota
Minneapolis MN
612-626-2928
Dr. Ron Federici
Developmental Neuropsychologist
Tests and evaluates post-institutionalized children
400 S. Washington
Alexandria VA
Tel. 703-548-0721
Sharon Cermak
Works with Romanian adoptees in U.S. and runs program in orphanage in Buzau Romania
Professor of Occupational Therapy
Boston University
Sargent College
635 Commonwealth Avenue
Boston MA 02115
Tel. 617-353-7500
Dr. Jeri Jenista
Pediatrician specializing in Eastern Europe
University of Michigan
Ann Arbor MI
Tel. 313-668-0419
Dr. Lori Miller
Pediatrician specializing in Eastern Europe
New England Medical Center
Boston MA
Tel. 617-636-5080
Dr. Victor Groze
Has studied the effects of institutionalization on Romanian adoptees
Case Western University
Cleveland OH
Tel. 216-368-6682
TPOINT@abc.com (TPOINT)
Response:
According to NAIC, the experts on this information are the people at Adoption Advocates. Their web site is http://www.fpsol.com/adoption/advocates.html The page has links to email for both of the people involved in Adoption Advocates. Just click on the highlighted phrase Adoption Advocates at the very top of the first page and scroll down a bit. Steve Humerickhouse has the most expertise in legislation and can answer those questions. Tim O'Hanlon is most useful for subsidy, state, federal regulation related questions.
from SteveAdopt@aol.com
In response to post-adoption subsidy question. The answer is absolutely. It's not easy and fairly complicated, but Adoption Advocates staff has helped families all over the country. Infact, it is the major service we provide directly to families. So far we have lost very few attempts. As much as we hate it we do charge a small fee. The possibilities for success are very specific to the individual case. Consequently, it's better if the family contacts me by phone to see if they may be eligible--consultation naturally is free. Phone 612-521-1098.
The process uses the fair-hearing standard for all governement programs. The route to a fair hearing really depends on how the adoption took place, whether intercountry, private agency, public agency, etc. For more information on the process, Adoption Advocates has several sources. One Tim O'Hanlon wrote for the Child Welfare League, others are available through us and our fax service. But for the specifics on this, contact Tim at ohanlont@aol.com or ohanlonn@aol.com (his wife--n--is often easier to reach). Thanks for the questions.
Steve
More FAS information
http://www.ccsa.ca/fasgen.htm.
Response:
Please see the following:
Three articles which I have available.
Response:
See
Americans for African Adoptions
AMFAA is an adoption facilitator that places children from several African countries.
African Cradle, Inc.
Response:
I have forwarded your request to the Child Welfare Desk at the NCCANCH (National Center for Child Abuse and Neglect Clearinghouse). Because foster care is a child welfare institution, we sort things out that way so that child welfare questions go to them. They can do a database search for you but it you have internet access, you can do your own search at no charge. Their bibliographic database of more than 20,000 documents can be accessed via their web site at http://www.calib.com/nccanch
You can also call the NCCAN Clearinghouse at 1/800-FYI-3366 to order a publication of the Department of Health and Human Services called The National Survey of Current and Former Foster Parents. I believe that the Clearinghouse also has produced an annotated bibliography on Out of Home Care for a nominal fee.
I hope this information is helpful.
Mary Sullivan
National Adoption Information Clearinghouse
Response:
Yes, you can. This is considered an adult adoption as long as the 18 year old is competent. You should check the adoption law for your state and see what section it is. Then go to a law library and they should be able to tell you what forms you need to submit. (This is not an option for the adoption of international residents by US citizens.)
Response:
Yes, it is quite normal. Children vary considerably. We have 3 adopted kids and one couldn't care less, one is mildly interested and the last one is intensely interested. Have you looked at the the articles on our main index page about what to expect at different ages? There are several in the section "Once You've Adopted." For books on the subject, check out Tapestry Books.
Response:
Check out the following:
http://www.adopting.org/inter.html
http://www.adopting.org/race.html
Also, you can check out the research mailing list at:
Adoption Research Mailing List
To Subscribe: Send a message to listproc@cornell.edu and in the body of the message, type
subscribe adoption-research-l
Description: For those involved with adoption research.
Also, check with Pact, An Adoption Alliance, which deals solely with interracial adoptions.
Responses:
I read your posting online. I know that this must be so difficult for you and your family! I was adopted, and have never met my birthmother, I love and respect her very much though!- She has given me so much without even knowing it! No matter what your daughters decision is, I am sure it will be the right one.
My husband and I are looking to adopt a baby now, I can't have children due to fertility problems, so I know how your sister must feel too. I am not sure if adopting within a family is either a good or a bad thing, it may make a difficult situation even harder on your daughter, having to be around the baby so much, etc... I have never met anyone who has placed their child with a family member. Has your daughter looked into open adoption? That way she would know the family who is going to adopt her child, get to know them and stay in touch through letters, visits, phone, pictures, etc.... Your sister may want to look into it as well.
I know this is a very difficult time for your family, and my husband and I wish you, your daughter and her baby the very best. If you or your daughter have any questions abou twhat it may be like for her baby to grow up in an adoptive family, please write back or call (collect) anytime, I would be happy to share my experiences with all of you. As for placing the baby, the only one who can make that decision is your daughter, if she would like to discuss open adoption with a loving couple (no strings attached), have her give us a call, I would not dream of guiding, pressuring, or persuading her- just an open friendly ear to listen! :)
MaTTsGrrL@aol.com
I certainly have no experience in this matter. I feel, having an adopted son, that it would be awkward. I think she is much better off with an open adoption with strangers who she will get to know. My husband and I would be very interested if she is considering it. I hope I am not being too forward. Good luck!
email: bncarr@erols.com.
adoption within family
My sister had a son at age 17 planning to give him up for adoption. Our father insisted that he loved his grandson and wanted to raise him (he was newly remarried to a younger woman). It has been a disaster (the boy is now 14).
The reasons for this are: 1) my sister is immature, selfish, irresponsible, etc. and could not handle the situation emotionally. She keeps making promises to her son about taking him back, causing him untold anguish when it doesn't happen. It also hurts him if she doesn't spend time with him. To make matters worse, she now has a baby girl who she has decided to keep, aggravating his feelings of rejection. 2) My sister and father live in close proximity, forcing everyone to deal with this on a daily basis.
My opinion is that this situation will only work if: 1) your daughter can be mature and responsible about it and will truly act in her baby's best interests and 2) your sister and husband live far away. You're right--it seems like an ideal solution, but for the baby's sake, think about what it will be like for him/her. Seeing your daughter will be a constant reminder of rejection. I think limiting contact between them is essential.
God bless your daughter for not having an abortion. She's a brave girl.
Response:
The answer is that it depends on the person doing the home study. If you go for an independent adoption, it probably won't make any difference--in fact, it might help if he is still active in a 12 step program. I have heard of birthmothers in AA *requesting* adoptive parents who are in a 12 step program.If it's an agency adoption, I would ask the agency prior to going with the agency. It probably varies from worker to worker. One social worker I know states that 4 years of sobriety is considered to be a good amount of time.
Response:
The first step to starting a private adoption agency is to develop a business plan and budget for the first two years of operation. You can call the state licensing specialist in your state to obtain a packet of information regarding the licensing process.
Most states require that a social worker holding an MSW or equivalent degree in a related field like psychology or counseling be hired as the casework supervisor. Some states have requirements for a particular level of education for the agency director also.
Check with the state licensing specialist to see if there are different licenses issued for domestic as opposed to international as opposed to foster care. You may choose to obtain licenses for all three types of operation.
It would be helpful to you to have potential staff members identified and their resumes available for submission with your licensing application. Check with your state laws to see if there are restrictions on the type of incorporation agencies must have in order to obtain an adoption license. Some states require that adoption agencies be incorporated as nonprofits, others do not have that restriction.
I do not know your level of expertise in adoption. If you need referrals for adoption training, there are several resources available. NACAC (North American Council on Adoptable Children) puts on the largest adoption conference in North America in August - call 612-644-3036 to receive their newsletter and conference brochures. The 6th Biennial Conference on Open Adoption is set for the end of April and JCICS (Joint Council for International Children's Services) has a conference in April. I hope this information is helpful.
Mary Sullivan
National Adoption Information Clearinghouse
THE MEETING/love talk
Hi!: Draws-vee
I'm your mama: Ya teh-voy mama
You're my son: Tee moy seen
You're our daughter: Tee nash dochka
Our home is in America: Nosh dome f America.
I love you: Ya loo-blue tibya
I love Alexi: Ya loo-blue Alexi
Everything is okay: Beh-see-yo =
Nee-chee-voo
It's ok, don't worry: nee-chee voo
We're going home: Pie Dome
Let's go: Posh Lee
You are very great, good, etc: Tee ocean hah-roe-she
Good boy: hah-roe-she mall-check
good girl: hah-roe-she dee-vooch-ka
You are mine forever: Tee my-oh = nahf-seeg-dah, nahf-seeg-dah
= You are my sunshine: Tee my-oh = sole-neeshka
This is our house: Eta nahsh dome
This is our car: Eta nahsh mah-chee-nah
This is our church: Eta nosh ser-cuff
EATING PHRASES
Do you want a drink? Teh = hoe-chiss peet? (Or teh boo-dish peet?)
Do you want to eat? teh hoe-chis yest? (Or: teh boo-dish yest?)
Simple- eat? Yest? Drink? Peet?
Bread: kleb
juice: soak
apple: yah-blick-ka
banana: banan
candy: cone-fee-yeh-tee
water: vada
soup: soup
cookie: bisquit-tee
tea: chie
Toilet/naps
Toilet? Too-ah-lyet?
Pee: peet-zit
BM: Kah-kits
(toilet paper) boom-ah-gah
soap: meel-lah
a nap: spot
Go to sleep: spee
goodnight: spah-koy-nih noche
Stay (in bed, in the stroller, etc): stoy
good morning: doe-breh oo-trah
PEOPLE
grandma: babooska =
grandpa: dyah-dooshka
my brother: mean-ya braht
My sister: mean-ya see-estra
friend: droog
friends: droog-ee
our dog (cat) nahsh sibaka(kotka)
God: bog (rhymes with 'vogue')
Jesus: ee-suess
priest: papa
PARENTAL WARNINGS!!!
No!: Nyet! Or: neel-zah
Yes: Dah
Wait!: Pah-stoy
Poison: eta yat
Come here!: Eedeesh-hoo-dah
Get down: lah-zheesh
Be careful: asta-roe-zhna
Stop: stope
Stay: stoy
Stay by me: stoy ree-add-em
Don't touch: nee troe-gee
It's not safe: eta ah-pahs-nah
Please share: nah-bee dih-leetza
Hush! : Tee-haa
Listen!: Slew-shit
That's not allowed: eta nee zyah
Calm down: oo spakoysa
Go to your room: ee-deet svie-ya komnetta
THAT'S BAD!: Ploe-haa!
BEING SUPPORTIVE
Mama's here: Mama zz-dees
It's yours: eta tib-ya
I'm sorry: prass-tee minya
I forgive you: ya prahshoy tibya
Does you hurt? Bah-leet?
Where is the hurt? Koodah bahleet
Afraid? Tib-yeh sh-seeya?
Good!: Haa-rah-show! Or = Mall-lah-dee-ets
Membership is just $15 per year for an individual member; $50 per year for a contributor. You may mail your tax-deductible contribution to IAPA, P.O. Box 230238, Montgomery, AL 36123-0238.
Boyd Campbell
73344.75@CompuServe.com
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