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Is one parent's decision reason to question the validity of single parent adoption in general? I don't think so.

Continue reading Singled Out: A Bad Rap for Single Adoptive Parents

I don't think it was right to lump all single parents into one unfit lump. There are so many single parents who are wonderful parents who raise confident and secure children. There is no correlation between bad decision making and whether or not you are a single parent. You can be a bad parent and be part of a parenting team. Bad decisions is just that - bad decisions - and has no bearing on whether you are a single parent or a parent in a couple. All it takes for a child to thrive is a loving parent who gives a child a secure, loving, and supportive home. That can happen in a single parent home just as well as in a home with a mom and dad.

I was interested in adoption 5 years ago, and didn't pursue it then, why? Well, frankly I was told it wasn't the best thing for kids, I couldn't handle it on my own, I would never get approved, etc. So here I am, 5 years later, approved for adoption, stable in every way possible, and still realizing one thing... it just isn't that popular for a single man to adopt these days! I know we can't adopt from foreign countries, but why not the U.S.? It was soon discovered that all of the positive stories I was told about successful single parent adoptions apply to single women adopting, not men. Single women can adopt from most foreign countries. It is because single men have such a unusual stereo-type??? How nice to just classify all single men who seek to adopt as "predators", or "perverts". I not complaining here, just telling you what I'm hearing out here. Maybe it's because single men make up barely 3% of adoptive families, as I'm told. The success rate is extremely low, as I found out (after handing over my money for a private agency to conduct my home study) for single male prospective parents to adopt. So now that I've paid the money, waited for the home study for 5 months, NOW I'm told "by the way, there is a better chance that you will never be matched to a child than being matched to one, even one whose caseworker is open to single fathers... Two-parent families are the most ideal, for some yes, but not for all. Some of us single men have love in our hearts to share, not lust. We have a desire to nuture, to raise up confident, morally righteous children, boys and girls. But, it is obvious that the "system" doesn't see all of the good prospects they are throwing away, and the lives of the children that are being compromised (aging out) because of their "perfect" viewpoints.