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  #1  
Old 11-22-2005, 06:39 PM
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Default False Abuse Allegations

Child abuse is a national tragedy and greatly under-reported; however, many don't realize that 1/3 to 1/2 of all alerts are mistaken or unfounded. Learn why false allegations may occur, what parents can do, and where to find help.

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  #2  
Old 11-22-2005, 06:39 PM
dlee dlee is offline
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I had a little boy from the age of 8 weeks old he is now 4 i WAS IN THE PROCESs of adopting him. I am going through a divorvce my ex made false accusations about me they removed my son 4 months ago I am still fighting to get him back please tell me what to do
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  #3  
Old 11-23-2005, 02:24 PM
cranium cranium is offline
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I know that children have to be protected, but it seems that there are some problems in this area. I have heard dozens of stories of adoptive and foster parents who have had all of their children taken away because of false allegations. I don't know what the magical solution is to this problem. Children should be listened to and it is best to act when they say that something is wrong, but where is the line? Children have emotional and mental problems just like adults do and they are able to lie just like adults. False allegations can ruin people's lives forever regardless of whether they are later found innocent or not. It is sad for the foster and adoptive parents and it is sad for the child who is losing out on a great family. There are some good families out there that have been falsely accused of some horrible things that may never get over it. But there are also families out there who have truly abused a child and they should be punished for it for a long time. The sad thing is that there is just no way for the system to know for sure which allegations are false and which are true. So I guess the best thing for the children is to listen to what they are saying and act on it.
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Old 01-22-2006, 09:42 AM
SINDEY SINDEY is offline
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HI,
I HOPE O DO NOT AFEND ANYONE, BUT I'M A GRANDMOTHER OF 6.AND MY HANDCAP, DAUGHTER GAVE ME FULLY CUSTODY OF 1 OF THE KIDS WE RAISED HER FROM BIRTH TELL SHE WAS ALMOST 5, SHE WAS A DRUG BABY, BUT VERY MUCH LOVED. THEN MY DAUGHTER HAD 3 MORE WITCH I HAD THRID PARTY COSTUDY OF.DEC OF OOOOO MY DAUGHTER THROUGHT SHE WANTED ALL THE KIDS BACK WELL HI ON DRUGS, SO SHE MADE A FALSE ALL, AND A WEEK LATER THEY TOOK MY GRANDKIDS, I NEVER NEW ANY OF THIS WAS GOING ON, IT ALL HAPPEN BEHIND MY BACK.AND MAY I SAY CPS HAD A HAND IN HELPING MY DAUGHTER TRY AND GET HER KIDS. BUT THE CPS WORKER WAS ALSO TAKING THEM FROM HER.SHE BUIDED HER SELF.AND I LOST ALSO.AND I RAISED ALL MY KIDS WITH OUT CPS BEING INVOLVED.SO IF ANYONE KNOWS HOW TO OPEN A CASE UP PLEASE LET ME KNOW. BUT I WANTED TO SAY CPS AND FOSTER HOMES ARE NOT THAT GREAT OR ARE THEY ALWAYS RIGHT.FRIST FOSTER HOME MY GRANDDAUGHTER WENT INTO SHE WAS MOLESTED..
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  #5  
Old 03-03-2006, 08:42 PM
ToBeAMom ToBeAMom is offline
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Default False Abuse Allegations

My husband and I were doing foster to adopt which turned into a "nightmare"...my husband was falsely accused of abuse of the foster daughter we had since 8 months AFTER we declined another foster child to adopt who had same mother different father and were never raised together. The social workers who came to do the investigations both said they knew it was a "bogus" allegation, but had to do their job. No criminal charges were ensued, but we retained an attorney just in chase and of course they took our foster daughter from us who was then 18 months old and calling us "mommy and daddy". How does someone recover from that nightmare and where can you go to adopt after that? What agencies private and/or public will work with you and overlook the "unsubstantiated false abuse allegations? PLEASE HELP!!
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  #6  
Old 07-06-2006, 06:54 PM
bstanley bstanley is offline
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my husband and i adopted sibling of 5 and a single child. our familoy was doing good until we took this adhd child. no one told us what we where in for . this child tured pur hpuse up side down. he acused us of abuse that was not proved but he was sexual abusing our 3 and 4 year old at the time. tell me how do you get over that. they closed our home for fostercare and the worker tried to put words in the children,s mouth to say we beat them. the children told us that the worker told them what was going on and at 5 years old they went along with what ever was said. but they saied the children was in no danger. no ythey were not by us but the young man they let us adopt without telling us all his history put them in danger. how do you get over that. my husband said he would never adopt again.

bstanley
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  #7  
Old 07-06-2006, 11:19 PM
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bstanley-

I can't even imagine what your family has been through - false allegations have got to be one of the worst parts of the system!

How are your 6 children doing dealing with the aftermath of it all? Did you get family counseling?

Diane
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  #8  
Old 07-18-2006, 10:20 PM
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That stinks! I am sorry that you are having such a horrible experience. Why does the system seem to fail so many innocent and caring people. I can't believe they closed your home to fostering. Good luck to you.
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Old 08-22-2006, 10:00 PM
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Default I have an idea to handle hotline reports

I am seriously looking for a solution to the false reports made and all the ways ANY hotline call is responed to. I have an idea I have been expressing to everyone I can find that will listen.
For a quick background:
My husband and I are foster/adopt parents for the past 12yrs. We adopted a sibling group of 3 and then a single. We have had several hotline calls all have been unfounded. A couple were by our own kids and a couple were from well meaning onlookers.
This past Friday we were the "victims" of a retaliation hotline. My home was litterally raided by 2 cops and an investigator. When I came to the door they pushed their way in and would not talk to me until they turned on my water and checked for food. Then they told me we were accused of verbal abuse. Because I have an extension cord on my fridge and a few tiles off the wall under my shower I was told I was in violation of city code and would be turned in and shut down if those two things were not fixed by the following Monday. That deadline was yesterday and so far the investigator has not shown back up or called.
Without this becoming to lengthy,, my sibling group have all been dx with serveral severe mental disorders, ADHD, RAD, ODD, PTSD, AS and bi polar. Our daughter is in a sever manic state right now. All three were in hospitals this summer at the same time. One still is. One is in transition back home.We are involved with 3 doctors, 5 theripists and 2 inhome workers that come to my house twice a week.
My solution is this:: There has to be a way that an office can be set up that will field the hotline calls, police calls or any that involve any other offical. Homes like mine that are already being constantly monitored can be flagged and investigated by the workers already in place. The last thing my chilren needed last Friday was the police busting in and threating to take them away from us or making them be moved from thier home. There were other things such as my son and daughter told the police and investigator off. They didn't have to do what anyone says, they don't like their rooms clean, and they bust out windows because they want to. What ammunition was added to the kids when they found out that the police and investigator indeed could not make them do anything.
I am in the process of putting my ideas on paper and seeing who I can get to help me make some active changes and contact people who need this project and can help or give input.
My email is CheyGrama@aol.com. Please contact me if you are interested in chatting more about this.
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  #10  
Old 09-06-2006, 06:17 PM
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We have a child that we adopted at 11. He is now 13 and he has turned out life upside down in a lot of ways. Just tonight he implied that if he would have responded my husband would hit him. My head just about split open at just the implication of that. The only time this child has been disiplined is when he tried to set our house on fire.. twice... and I believe that I had that right. I can't even imagine being accused but there are days that I can't help but think that day is right around the corner. After the first year of living with him I began documenting the good, the bad and the ugly and I make sure his therapists know what is gong on. 2.5 years after his adoption I am counting the days until he turns 18. There isn't enough therapy in the world to solve his mental problems. I wish I could say that I love him but instead I am really strating to resent what he has done to our lives.
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