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Archived Legal Expert Diane Michelsen"Long before I became an adoptive mom, I was active in the family formation field. I established the Adoption and Surrogacy Law Office of Diane Michelsen in 1980. My pre-law experience as an adoption social worker with county and state agencies, and my own personal experiences with infertility and adoptive parenting have all helped enhance my skills."
Diane Michelsen is currently President of the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys.
Adopting in Minnesota
Dear Diane, I am a prospective adoptive parent. I live in Minnesota. The Birth Mom found us and we very much want to adopt her baby. However, we have been dismayed at the costs estimated for adopting. The birthmom wants this to work, and we want to make sure that ALL her needs are met so that she can make her decision with true informed consent. Knowing that, what is the least expensive route to take? Agency or Attorney? If the later, then Knowing a little about MN law, can we just pay for the attorney to represent her and forgo highering one for ourselves? Can we represent ourselves?? Thank you for your thoughts and expertise.
Response from Diane Michelsen:
Hello: Minn has classically been an agency only state. I recommend that you contact one of the American Academy of Adoption Attorneys from MN and pose your question. Following is an alphabetical listing of those attorneys:
Gary Debele or Jody DeSmidt ( Minneapolis) 612 340-1150;
Steven Gawron (Bloomington) 612 854-4483;
Amy Silberberg (Afton) 612 436-6550;
Judity Vincent (Minneapolis) 612 332-7772; and
Wright Walling (Minneapolis) 612 340-1150.
Any of them should be able to assist you with current MN law.
InterState Compact
My husband and I are looking into adoption. We have joined an agency in VT. We reside in NY State. My sister in law is our attorney. I am also her paralegal. We have never done an agency adoption let alone an interstate adoption. I have looked up the laws in the books and it is a bit confusing. If someone could offer a general checklist of proceedures that need to be followed it would make things much easier. We have already completed our homestudy as well as finger prints but that is pretty much it. Thank you in advance for any help you may be able to offer us.
Response from Diane Michelsen:
Call the interstate Compact office in NY, Ann Furman 518 474-9506 and ask what documents they need as the receiving state. Then call the ICPC coordinator of the sending state and ask what docs they need. If the sending state is Vermont, the administrator is Frederich Ober 800 241-2131. Different states have different requirements; the requirements don't necessarily dovetail. Sometimes, you have to pull in Washington DC, or the head compact person to connect the requirements so you're legal. Othertimes the substantial compliance is all that's necessary. Hope this helps.
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Diane Michelsen
dianem@silcon.com
HTTP://WWW.LODM.COM
Adoption Reversal
Hello,
My girl friend lives in Connecticut and is 21. She was adopted when she was around 7 or 8 years old. Her birth mother and step father have been apart for around 1 year. She is interested in adoption reversal. Her real father hasn't been part of her life since she was between 3 and 5. By your posts regarding adoption, it seems this is not a viable solution. Her concern is, when she has children of her own, does her step father have any rights to see these children since he is legaly their grandfather? She wants nothing to do with him since he is abusive (mentally) and he wants to hurt everyone close to her mother to get back at her for leaving him. He is a very angry and vindictive person. She has not had any contact with him in this year due to her choice. So basically, does he have any legal rights to see his step grandchildren or is this up to her to decide if he has any contact with them.
Response from Diane Michelsen:
It appears to me that the step grandfather does not have any "legal" right to see his grandchildren unless there is a specific law in Connecticut so decreeing. This needs to be checked under local law.
However, an alternative for the mother instead of adoption reversal, may be to have herself adopted by another adult who would take her father's position. Then the children would have a different grandfather completely. She will need to check Connecticut law to verify that this is viable in that state while still keeping her mom as legal mom, ie grandmom
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Diane Michelsen
dianem@silcon.com
HTTP://WWW.LODM.COM
Special Needs Adoption and Race
We are in the process of trying to adopt a special needs child. We contacted a State social worker in Washington state about a child that was African American. One of the first questions she asked us is if we were Black or Bi-racial. We said no, we are caucasion. She explained that a preference would be given to a African American or bi-racial family. She said that it does not necesarily exclude us from consideration, but a black or bi-racial family would have first consideration. Essentially, she said that if no African American or Bi-racial families applied, we would be considered. We thought that the law prevented this. We understood that the new federal law mandates that race or ethnic background cannot be used in any way during an adoption process. Does the law allow for preferences or exclusions based on someones race or ethnic background during an adoption process?
Response from Diane Michelsen:
It appears that what the social worker was telling you is in violation of the law. There is to be no racial preference or matching regarding adoptions. Not only is it illegal, flying in the face of federal law, but it is also a civil rights violation. The agency stands to lose their federal funding if they don't pay attention to federal and I bet state laws.
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Diane Michelsen
dianem@silcon.com
HTTP://WWW.LODM.COM
My Sister is Pregnant
Help My sister is pregnant, she wants me and my husband to take the baby and raise it as our own. She is handicapped, she has a 3 year old that we have been helping her to raise. She no longer lives with us. We have no idea what steps we need to take if any. When I was 8 months old my mother gave me to her sister to raise. As far as I know she never had any problems, from a legal standpoint. I was never adopted. This was over 35 years ago. Any information you can give would be greatly appreciated
Response from Diane Michelsen:
While you did not indicate what state you reside in, some states have laws about having a child in your home for more than 30 days without either having family status or a legal petition pending. Assuming this is nopt an issue, you may want to get either a guardianship or an adoption of your neice for insurance purposes. Otherwise the insurance company is not bound to cover this child and may balk later if there is an expensive outlay. Lastly, without an adoption or guardianship, your sister has the right to remove the child from your care at any time.
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Diane Michelsen
dianem@silcon.com
HTTP://WWW.LODM.COM
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