Home
| Jody: | Yes, but at times, they seem to get confused, likely from listening to the other kids' stories here at home. |
| Donnita: | I assured them they were loved and if I could have done it differently I would have. |
| Jody: | They know that Donnita never abused them, that she was doing all that she could to protect them. I have essentially told them the very same thing for 7 years. |
| Mari: | How did your youngest deal with meeting his brothers? |
| Jody: | He is sooooooo cute |
| Donnita: | He has always known about his brothers. I never, never hid it from him. He was so thrilled that five minutes after we got there we had to look for him. He was in the other room playing video games with the kids. |
| Jody: | I would say that he was very well prepared....and we all got to talk to each other several times on the phone. |
| Donnita: | Yes, talking with them had given him the reality. I also had pics all over the house. |
| Kilo: | Have your boys asked about their father? |
| Donnita: | Not in detail to me. Jody? |
| Jody: | They haven't asked too many questions, because in the first place, bdads are typically secondary to the moms. |
| Donnita: | I have told my 8 y.o. he was mean to us and we had to leave to be happy. |
| Jody: | Also, I have explained to the boys in the kindest way possible that he is an abusive individual. |
| Donnita: | As much as he did, I don't feel that it is my place to bash their father, they'll find out in time. |
| ToniD5: | So even the oldest boy doesn't remember the abuse? |
| Donnita: | We're not sure |
| Jody: | Apparently not, but Donnita and I are both questioning that, as he has some behaviors that are suspicious |
| Donnita: | He was young, 3, there may be behaviors because of the abuse. I did notice that at times, he acts just like his father. |
| Jody: | In case you haven't noticed, Donnita and I are very much alike. LOL....Mother-daughter...it's genetic....LOL. |
| Donnita: | LOL, even the boys say we talk alike and say the same things. |
| Mari: | What type of behavioral problems do the boys have...and do they go to counseling? |
| Jody: | Yes, they're in counseling. They are both ADHD, with some other issues, mostly tantrums, inability to accept responsibility for their actions. The oldest has very little respect for females....and can get rather mouthy. We're watching him for schizophrenia. However, both are wonderful students in school. |
| Donnita: | Malcolm also has ADHD, is bipolar, rage disorder, and learning disabled. Schizophrenia runs in his father's family... not sure the extent. |
| Jody: | Or a genetic component |
| Donnita: | Possibly, that's why we are watching the behaviors of all the children. |
| Jody: | For every negative deed the father placed on the boys, Donnita would try to counteract in the most positive way. |
| Chat Moderator: | Donnita, I understand you got along famously with the entire Swarbrick crew.... and so did your fiancé. |
| Donnita: | LOL. We were kids all weekend long... trampoline, basketball, video games |
| Jody: | The kids absolutely adored Donnita, Malcolm and Carl. We love em....Donnita, have you told the story about Robin? |
| Donnita: | No, not yet, she was extraordinary. She really has touched my heart and I've adopted her. LOL. She will probably never have the opportunity for a reunion, so I'm claiming the bmom spot! |
| Jody: | This is literal. Robin does not have the opportunity to know her bMom yet...maybe it will change, but bMom was adamant, no contact, ever. Robin who's 10 was very curious....so Donnita stepped in. |
| Chat Moderator: | I don't want to keep you too long - it's not like you don't have any other commitments... so, is there anything each of you wants to say in conclusion? |
| Jody: | Yes.....Having Donnita in our lives is one of the most positive things that could have ever happened. |
| Donnita: | There doesn't have to be an animosity between bmom and amom. Jody has become like a mom to me as well. I wouldn't trade the relationship for the world. |
| Jody: | I dearly love her.... |
| Donnita: | I love you too. |
| Chat Moderator: | Any final questions from the peanut gallery? |
| Donnita: | Speak now are forever hold your shells |
| Kilo: | Jody, do you have any room for me at your house? |
| Jody: | Absolutely, Kilo...... |
| Donnita: | There's plenty of room for everyone. |
| Kilo: | LOL...You BOTH sound like great moms! |
| rosemom: | Jody and Donnita: Am so glad you are here so that others can WITNESS the love between a Bmother and Amother... there is no need for war. |
| Donnita: | I agree rose, I always had that fear, but Jody has removed that. she is wonderful. I now work with the system to help families stay together. |
| rosemom: | Oh, Donnita , I see.... Domestic Violence - Breaking the Cycle!! |
| Chat Moderator: | Thank you both, Jody and Donnita, for taking time to do this! |
Email Page to a Friend | Feedback | Adoption | Adoption Wiki | Parent Profiles | Infertility | Adoption Information
© Adopting.org 1995-2008. This site should not substitute personal professional, legal, or medical advice. The accuracy and personal applicability of this information is not guaranteed. By using it you agree to the terms of service, including jurisdiction and limitation of liability provisions.
Add Your Comments!
We want to know what you think. Your comments are important to us and the other readers. You are what makes this site special.