Reunion: Hearts on the Line
One of the first cautions given to those considering a search for birth family members is to explore their reasons for searching; to understand that people's lives are going to be affected forever, no matter the outcome.
Along the way, searching can turn up errors, false leads, and even purposely misleading information. Sometimes mistakes are made.
Here's one story that will hopefully make us think, and prompt us to be more sensitive to the impact we can have on the lives of others.
Winter Hearts
by Katie Kerwin We are as comfortable with each other as we are in the well-worn jeans we wear. We have constructed a life together, built on a foundation of shared experience, each brick of our lives cemented into place with memories. It has taken many years to build this private palace to our personal specifications.
***
It was two days into the New Millennium, which we had celebrated quietly with our three teenagers, adding yet another brick to the palace. The house had been in a flurry of activity over the Holidays, and we were finally alone for the evening. A new snow insulated the house and we were enjoying the cocoon-like solitude it offered. Outdoors, it was eerily quiet. Indoors, we had just built a crackling fire and opened a bottle of champagne. We were curled up together watching an old movie we'd seen before when we were suddenly startled by the intrusion of the doorbell. Momentarily looking inquisitively at each other, he said, "I'll get it," and reluctantly rose from his warm indentation in the sofa and shuffled to the front door. When he reappeared a short time later, he looked ashen in spite of the warm glow of the fireplace. His hand was shaking, clutching a piece of rose-colored message pad paper.
"It was Gail, from across the street," he told me nervously. "She said someone has been trying to find us through the Internet and was able to come up with a list of our neighbors, as our phone number's not listed. She took a number for us to call if we wish." We both knew who was trying to contact him.
"Go call her," I said confidently. "You've waited a long time for this."
Comments
What a sad story of a "reunion." I feel for Kerri that she will never know her father. I ache for this man who had for twenty five years carried around the guilt of giving a child up for adoption and then finding out that he had not fathered a child at all. What an emotional upheaval this must have caused for Kerri, her adoptive parents, and this couple who thought she was going to become part of their lives. This story should show readers that even though we think we have the story about our birth, that sometimes it may not be true and we should be careful in our search.
Posted by: culinary at 12/01/2005 03:59 PM
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