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Techniques That Work

Techniques That Work

A major part of our first RAD chat focused on sharing ideas and techniques that have resulted in measurable progress. Some of these were:

• Strong sitting: A technique used to help teach children self control. They sit with a straight strong back, still and quiet, taking time to think and get control. Some sit cross-legged on the floor, others in a straight chair.
• Keeping emotion out of parent's voice: Using a steady, calm voice when dealing with unacceptable behaviors.
• 12 hugs a day: Taken from Martha Welch's Holding Time, the theory is that it takes 8 hugs a day to maintain a positive bond, and 12 to create one.
• Chores: Using chores instead of timeouts, followed by praise when completed.
• Babying: (Even for teens) Cuddling, holding, rocking, and even using a baby bottle, and stuffed animals in bed. Also nursery rhymes and children's games for internationally adopted children.
• Reminders: For most RAD children, out of sight really is out of mind. A few of the techniques mentioned as reminders during times of separation (school, daycare, visits):
  • Write notes, give them pictures, or parents' t-shirts to wear;
  • Draw a happy face on their hand with a marker before they go to school;
  • Draw a heart over their heart.
• Great responses: When meeting with resistance to compliance:
  • "Thank you for letting me know you are tired and need a nap," and send your child to his/her room. Then try again in about 30 minutes.
  • "Thank you for letting me know you are not strong enough to handle that right now. No problem, I will do it for you."

• Chat Summary
• Chat Transcript
• Resources/References
• Symptoms of RAD

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