Post-Adoption Contact Agreements - How To Make One

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Part 3: How To Make One

There are basically four types of adoptions:

Confidential adoptions (closed) - no exchange of information between birth and adoptive families post-placement;
Time-limited mediated adoptions (semi-open) - information exchanged by an agency caseworker or third party for a specific period following the adoption at the end of which, information exchanges stop;
Ongoing mediated adoptions (semi-open) - information exchanges are mediated by an agency or third party on an ongoing basis, and
Fully disclosed adoptions (open) - direct sharing of information between adoptive and birth family member(s), usually accompanied by face-to-face meetings.

Once the type of adoption is agreed upon, adoption professionals recommend that

wording of post-adoption agreements be specific;
both parties should be as honest as possible about their desires and expectations;
mediation services are encouraged, both when the agreement is formulated, and post-adoption in the event of a desire to change the terms or conflict;
some agreements may include members of the extended birth family (i.e., grandparents) or others, depending on prior contact, if it's considered adviseable for the well-being of the child.

More of this Feature

•Part 1: What Are They?
•Part 2: Why Make One?
Part 3: How to Make One
•Part 4: Legalities

The best Net resource for a description of how an agreement can be formulated is the State of Oregon, Office for Services to Children and Families. While this document describes mediation in termination cases, the consideration of the child's best interest, the value of openness, cooperation between placing and adopting parents, and specific issues are comprehensive in scope and can be adapted to agreements in other types of adoption.

See Glossary definitions:
Closed Adoption
Open Adoption
Semi-Open Adoption

Next page > Legalities > Page 1, 2, 3, 4

Comments

I think that in the case of open adoption that it is best to be honest with the birthmother in how much contact that you will be comfortable with. Otherwise, you will feel uncomfortable each time that you HAVE to have contact with them. If you lay down the contact rules before anything is signed then you will more likely be able to comply with them without the dread and fear that can be associated with some contact. Tell the birthmother what you would like and ask her what she would like. Then you can both try to get on the same page for the best of the child. After all, isn't that what you both want? The best for the child?

Posted by: congressional at 11/10/2005 07:42 AM

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