Kids Talk About Adoption

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Heard on the Forum

Adopting/Adoptive Parents
"I started telling my son (now 3 1/2) his adoption story from the time he was a 7 or 8 months old. He seems very comfortable with it, and in fact the other day we were watching his Hercules movie and he informed me that Hercules was adopted too. I asked him how he knew that, and he stated that because Hercules had a mother and father and then another mommy and daddy found him and raised him."
SHANNA97

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After commiserating over the annoying things people say about adoption (or to those who live the adoption experience), it's a pleasure to turn to our kids and listen to what they have to say.

Of course, young children live that part of the adoption experience that affects them directly (and most of the resources available that address talking to children are directed toward adoptive parents); however, members of all segments of the adoption community have been sharing their kids' words on our discussion forum. Listen in as children from all around the adoption community have their say. And as they say... "Out of the mouths of babes..."

Adopted Kids

"Breanna has already said she doesn't want to be the youngest, and Joey and Brittany asked if they could help pick out the next kids." --Members of a recently placed sibling group of 4

"When I was very very tiny A (bmom) swallowed me & then I grew in her tummy until I got big... and then I got born, and she gave me to my mommy & daddy to be my parents." -- Connor, age 3 1/2

"I grew in T's tummy when I was a little baby but then I wanted my Mommy and Daddy and we were all so happy."and"The first time I told Seth babies came from tummies he said, 'Mom they didn't eated them,' in a tone like 'you are so stupid.'" --Seth, age 4

"Oh yeah, R taked care of me until you could come get me. One day the lady called you on the phone and asked if you wanted a baby and you said you did and that her name is Thia. And you came and got me and we were soooo happy!" --Thia, age 3 1/2

Children of Adoptees

"'Mom, I'm not adopted am I?'
'No.'
'Good!'
'Why?'
'Cause it's a pain in the butt to find your birthmom!'" -- Susanne, age 8

"'Mom, does this mean I have a grand... something again? What would they be to me? Will they love me like grandma did (my amom)? I'm happy you found them, but it's so sad that your birth momma isn't alive; I'm sad for you.' (followed by a hug and) 'it's okay to be sad mommy.'" --Galen, age 6 3/4 after his mom found her birth uncle

Children of birth parents

"'Actually, mom I didn't know you lost him... I just hope he's nicer to me than I am to my little brother!'" -- Cory, age 6, after his mother's search for her birthson

"My son thinks it was 'nice' of me to give Natalie to her parents because they could not have a baby. He asks a lot of hard questions though. 'Why can't we go to their house?', 'How come I am not invited to her b-day?', 'Can she spend the night?', and [when] I say no, 'Why not?'"

Children in the lives of adopting parents

"Thia's favorite book to look at is my MN waiting children's photo listing book. One night after she was tucked in bed she asked my aunt, 'Did you pick me out of a book too?'" --Cousin of adopting parents, age 3 1/2

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