Diary of a Birthmom, page 5

We had group today and I showed my collage of who I am. Self Magazine's here doing a story.

We went to dinner with an AP mom. She's adopted two kids. I can't reconcile what I'm doing with what my mom did to me, which was to place me in several homes during my life. I talked to her tonight but not about anything, really. I'm almost done with your scrapbook. That kind of makes me sad. I want to see what you look like. I wonder what you're thinking.

I finally started on a Gladney novel about my experience. I was up till midnight cleaning. One of the house parents is going to my placement with me at a playground I found. You did a big karate kick the other night. It was cool! I'm going tonight to find a baby gift. I want to get two bracelets - one for me and one for you so one day if we're reunited we'll each have one.

We had group today. The Self Magazine reporter called back and finished interviewing me.

I finally cried in therapy about my grief with the adoption. Mother's Day's in three days. I started to see I'm not like my mom. My counselor wants me to list ways I'm different than her. Mom called tonight and wanted to talk to my doctor. I was shocked. I got an extra temporary job at the greenhouse for five days. I wrote my adoption story for a resident and one of the administrators here. A friend of mine said she couldn't go to my placement so I'm going to ask my sponsor and another friend.

Today's Mother's Day. We got taken out by some APs for dinner. I liked them. But they don't plan on adopting any more since they already did. I was sad most of the day. We got flowers. I talked to my mom. My step dad wants to come for the delivery, which totally surprised me. The Times article came out today on Gladney.

I went back to the doctor today and got a glucose test.

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