Adoption and Your Child's Teachers

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with Rita Taddonio, CSW
Director of SPARK (ChildDevelopment program) at Spence-Chapin

Question: My daughter is three and just started preschool. We have told her teacher that she is adopted, but haven't said anything more.Do we need to? She loves her teacher, and I don't want to make an issue where there is none.
Rita: I believe that it is good to have a chat with the teacher to find out if she understands about positive adoption language and feels comfortable addressing questions other children might ask.

Question: How would you suggest I broach the subject?
Rita: If you have a good basic article (which you can find in Adoptive Families or other places), bring it to the teacher and offer it to her as a resource. Most teachers welcome any help they can get.

Question: OK. My concern is that I don't want to come off like I have some huge problem related to my daughter's adoption. I don't want her to be thought of as ADOPTED, and I worry that talking about it might cause that reaction. By that I mean, I don't want her to have that label on all the time. Right now she is just her cute self.
Rita: It's how you present it - adoption isn't a problem but it is greatly misunderstood and many people still have stereotypes. It's not about your daughter only; it's about establishing a classroom sensitivity to the variety of family types that exist today. I agree that we don't want to label or put our kids on the spot. That is why a private chat with the teacher is proactive and well private.

•Page 1: Opening Remarks
•Page 2: Don't Want to Make an Issue
•Page 3: Parent Presentations
•Page 4: Child Doesn't Want Teacher to Know
•Page 5: Blame and Bullying

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